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Receiving can be giving - taking is not taking away
For everyone who gives a compliment or finds a generous thing to do or say there is the recipient. Without the givee there is no giver. It’s the flow that is important. The flow of one person's energy to another
person. Who knows where that energy stops? Perhaps the good feelings that are generated go on and change a person's life forever. Taking, being the recipient, can extend the good feelings or it can stunt the flow.
Learning how to accept gifts, compliments, help, is a skill that we can all develop. Imagine the difference in these two scenarios:
- Linda says, “Hi Martha. You were great out there. You were really moving and passing well to the open person.”
- Martha replies, “I missed Betty wide open in front of the goal”.
- Or
- Martha replies, “Thanks Linda.”
- Play these two scenarios in your head for a second. Visualize the people and the conversation. Visualize their body language when they say and hear the different responses.
Do you see how in the first example Martha discounted what Linda said? Linda complimented Martha with a specific comment on what made her performance great. Martha’s comment implies ideas like, “Yeah but weren’t
you watching?” “Maybe but that’s not good enough” “Linda, you don’t know what you’re talking about.”
Perhaps Martha is really conscious of her play and seeking ways to improve her performance. Doing your best is admirable and a way to get in touch with the power of the universe. We all aspire to be better at
what we do. Better ball players and better receivers. Martha can do both. In this moment, in response to Betty’s comment, she can be a better receiver. Improving her “game” can happen when play starts again.
When you are the receiver, the person receiving the award or compliment, that is a time to help those around you celebrate your successes and accomplishments. Choose another time to apply your critical eye.
Try this:
Just say, “Thank you.” Want to generate power and energy? Want to help people feel good about being around you and supporting you? When you receive a compliment, think twice before you do more than look the
person in the eyes and say, “You’re welcome.” or “Thank you Linda.”.
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